Dealing with Emotional Problems Using Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT) : A Practitioner's Guide

In this practical companion to the client manual, Windy Dryden draws on Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT) – an approach that focuses on identifying, examining and changing the rigid/extreme attitudes that largely determine emotional and behavioural issues – to encourage people to deal with their emotional problems. Including all of the information presented in the Client’s Guide with the addition of helpful hints and tips for the therapist, the Practitioner’s Guide is straightforward to use in the consulting room with no need for further references. It allows the therapist to work through and help the client learn to deal with their problems from an REBT perspective, covering: • anxiety • depression • guilt • shame • hurt • unhealthy anger • unhealthy jealousy • unhealthy envy • and a new chapter on unhealthy regret. This practical guide presents each emotion in a similar way, allowing the reader to compare and contrast common and distinctive features of each problem. With new REBT research and updated, accessible terminology, this new edition will remain essential reading for any professional using REBT with their client. Cover Half Title Title Page Copyright Page Table of Contents Preface Introduction Why I Have Changed Activating Event to Adversity Why I Have Changed Beliefs to Attitudes Why I Have Changed Irrational Beliefs to Rigid and Extreme Attitudes and Why I Have Changed Rational Beliefs to Flexible and Non-Extreme Attitudes Why I Have Changed Low Frustration Tolerance (LFT) Beliefs to Unbearability Attitudes and High Frustration Tolerance (HFT) Beliefs to Bearability Attitudes Why I Have Changed Disputing Beliefs to Examining Attitudes Notes Chapter 1 Emotional Problems: Foundations and Healthy Alternatives What Are the Nine Emotional Problems? Healthy Alternatives to the Nine Emotional Problems Problems With Positive Emotions as Healthy Alternatives to the Emotional Problems Problems With Neutral Emotions as Healthy Alternatives to the Emotional Problems Problems With Living in an Emotional Vacuum as a Healthy Alternative to the Emotional Problems Problems With Reducing the Intensity of Emotional Problems as Healthy Alternatives to These Emotional Problems Healthy Negative Emotions (HNEs) as Healthy Alternatives to the Emotional Problems Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy The Nine Emotional Problems Are Underpinned By Rigid/extreme Attitudes Rigid Attitudes Three Extreme Attitudes The Healthy Alternatives to the Nine Emotional Problems Are Underpinned By Flexible and Non-Extreme Attitudes Flexible Attitudes Three Non-Extreme Attitudes Inference Themes in Relation to Your Personal Domain Personal Domain Inference Inference Theme Distinguishing Emotional Problems From Their Healthy Alternatives Inference Themes and Attitudes Associated Behaviour Associated Thinking In the ‘ABC’ Model of REBT, Thinking Can Occur Notes Chapter 2 Dealing With Anxiety Understanding Anxiety Major Inference Themes in Anxiety Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Anxiety Thinking Associated With Anxiety Threat-exaggerating Thinking Safety-seeking Thinking How to Deal With Anxiety Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Anxiety Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Anxiety Step 3: Identify the Threats You Tend to Be Anxious About Major Threats to Self-Esteem Major Threats That Do Not Involve Your Self-Esteem Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Anxiety Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Anxiety Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/ Non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 6: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your Main General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 7: Face Your Threat in Imagery Step 8: Face Your Threat in Reality Step 9: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 10: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Anxiety Other Important Issues in Dealing With Anxiety Why You Overestimate Threat and How to Deal With It Why You Overestimate Threat How to Deal With Your Overestimations of Threat How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Inference of Threat, If Necessary Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Anxiety Assessing Anxiety About Anxiety Dealing With Anxiety About Anxiety Developing and Rehearsing Non-Anxious, Concern-Based World Views Note Chapter 3 Dealing With Depression Understanding Depression The Three Realms of Your Personal Domain That Are Implicated in Depression The Autonomous Realm The Sociotropic Realm The Deservingness Realm Major Inference Themes in Depression Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Depression Thinking Associated With Depression How to Deal With Depression Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Depression Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Become Active Step 3: Take Responsibility for Your Depression Step 4: Identify the Themes You Tend to Be Depressed About Common Themes in Sociotropic Depression Common Themes in Autonomous Depression The Theme in Pity-Based Depression Step 5: Identify the Three Components of Your Depression Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Depression Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 6: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/ Non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 7: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 8: Face Your Loss, Failure and Undeserved Plight in Imagery Step 9: Face Your Loss, Failure and Undeserved Plight in Reality Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Depression Other Important Issues in Dealing With Depression Why You Focus So Much On Loss, Failure and Undeserved Plight and How to Deal With this Why You Focus So Much On Loss, Failure and Undeserved Plight How to Deal With Your Selective Focus On Loss, Failure and Undeserved Plight How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Inference of Loss, Failure Or Undeserved Plight, If Necessary Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Depression Assessing Depression About Depression Dealing With Depression About Depression Developing and Rehearsing Non-Depressed, Sadness-Based World Views Notes Chapter 4 Dealing With Guilt Understanding Guilt Major Inference Themes in Guilt Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Guilt Thinking Associated With Guilt How to Deal With Guilt Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Guilt Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Guilt Step 3: Identify the Themes You Tend to Be Guilty About Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Guilt Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Guilt Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 6: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Self-Devaluation Attitude and Its General Unconditional Self-Acceptance Attitude Alternative Step 7: Take an Appropriate Amount of Responsibility and Understand Your Behaviour in Context Step 8: Face Your Guilt-Related Theme in Imagery Step 9: Apologise, Make Amends and Talk Things Through Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Guilt Other Important Issues in Dealing With Guilt Dealing With Your Safety-Seeking Measures to Avoid Guilt Why You Feel Guilty Much of the Time and How to Deal With this How to Deal With Chronic Guilt How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Guilt-Related Inference, If Necessary Dealing With Failure to Practise Healthy Self-Care How to Practise Healthy Self-Care Identifying and Dealing With the Hidden Conceit in Guilt Can You Hurt the Feelings of Others? Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Guilt Developing and Rehearsing Non-Guilt, Remorse-Based World Views Chapter 5 Dealing With Unhealthy Regret Understanding Unhealthy Regret Major Inference Themes in Unhealthy Regret Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Unhealthy Regret Thinking Associated With Unhealthy Regret How to Deal With Unhealthy Regret Step 1: Identify Which Type of Unhealthy Regret You Experience and the Reasons Why Unhealthy Regret Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Unhealthy Regret Step 3: Identify the Themes You Tend to Be Unhealthy Regretful About Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Regret Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Regret Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/ Non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 6: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your Relevant General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 7: Dispel the Myth of the Perfect Decision Solution and Understand Your Behaviour in Context In Retrospective Regret In Prospective Regret Step 8: Face Your Unhealthy Regret-Related Theme in Imagery Step 9: Forgive Yourself and Show Yourself Compassion Self-forgiveness Self-compassion Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Unhealthy Regret Other Important Issues in Dealing With Unhealthy Regret Dealing With Your Safety-Seeking Measures to Avoid Unhealthy Regret Accepting a Range of Outcomes From Making a Decision Accepting That You Can’t Know What You Don’t Know Why You Feel Unhealthy Regret Much of the Time and How to Deal With this How to Deal With Chronic Unhealthy Regret How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Unhealthy Regret-Related Inference, If Necessary Identifying and Dealing With the Hidden Conceit in Unhealthy Regret Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Unhealthy Regret Developing and Rehearsing Healthy Regret-Based World Views Notes Chapter 6 Dealing With Shame Understanding Shame Major Inference Themes in Shame Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Shame Thinking Associated With Shame How to Deal With Shame Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Shame Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Shame Step 3: Identify the Themes You Tend to Be Ashamed About Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Shame Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Shame Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 6: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Self-Devaluation Attitude and Its General Unconditional Self-Acceptance Attitude Alternative Step 7: Adopt a Healthy Orientation Towards Your High Standards Step 8: Face Your Shame-Related Theme in Imagery Step 9: Face Situations and People With Your Head Held High Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Shame Other Important Issues in Dealing With Shame Dealing With Your Safety-Seeking Measures to Avoid Shame Why You Feel Shame Much of the Time and How to Deal With this How to Deal With Chronic Shame How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Shame-Related Inference, If Necessary Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Shame Dealing With Shame About Shame Developing and Rehearsing Non-Shame, Disappointment-Based World Views Note Chapter 7 Dealing With Hurt UNDERSTANDING HURT Major Inference Themes in Feeling Hurt Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Hurt Thinking Associated With Feeling Hurt How to Deal With Feeling Hurt Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Feeling Hurt Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Hurt Step 3: Identify Themes You Tend to Feel Hurt About Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Hurt Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Hurt Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/ Non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 6: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 7: Adopt a Healthy Orientation Towards Reciprocity in Close Relationships and Its Absence Step 8: Face Your Hurt-Related Theme in Imagery Step 9: Face People Who Have Treated You Unfairly, Disclose Your Sorrow and Have a Constructive Conversation About the Experience Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Hurt Other Important Issues in Dealing With Hurt Dealing With Your Safety-Seeking Measures to Avoid Hurt Why You Feel Hurt Much of the Time and How to Deal With this How to Deal With Chronic Hurt How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Hurt-Related Inference, If Necessary Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Hurt Developing and Rehearsing Non-Hurt, Sorrow-Based World Views Chapter 8 Dealing With Unhealthy Anger Understanding Unhealthy Anger Major Inference Themes in Unhealthy Anger Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Unhealthy Anger Thinking Associated With Unhealthy Anger How to Deal With Unhealthy Anger Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Unhealthy Anger Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Understanding the Differences Between Unhealthy Anger and Healthy Anger Identifying and Responding to Your Positive Connotations of Unhealthy Anger and Your Negative Connotations of Healthy Anger Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Unhealthy Anger Step 3: Identify the Themes About Which You Tend to Feel Unhealthy Anger Anger-related Inferences Concerning Self Anger-related Inferences Concerning Others Common Anger-Related Inferences About Inanimate Objects Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Anger Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Anger Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 6: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 8: Act Assertively in Relevant Anger-Related Situations Step 9: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 10: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Unhealthy Anger Other Important Issues in Dealing With Unhealthy Anger Why You Overestimate the Presence of Anger-Related Themes and How to Deal With It Why You Overestimate the Presence of Disrespect How to Deal With Your Overestimations of the Presence of Disrespect How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Inference of Threat, If Necessary Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Unhealthy Anger Assessing Unhealthy Self-Anger About Unhealthy Anger Dealing With Unhealthy Self-Anger About Unhealthy Anger Developing and Rehearsing Healthy Anger-Based World Views Chapter 9 Dealing With Unhealthy Jealousy Understanding Unhealthy Jealousy Major Inference Themes in Unhealthy Jealousy Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Unhealthy Jealousy Thinking Associated With Unhealthy Jealousy How to Deal With Unhealthy Jealousy Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Unhealthy Jealousy Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Unhealthy Jealousy Step 3: Identify Themes About Which You Tend to Feel Unhealthy Jealousy Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Jealousy Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Jealousy Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Recognise That Your Symptoms of Unhealthy Jealousy Are Evidence of Disturbance and Not Necessarily of the Existence of Threat to Your Relationship Step 6: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 7: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 8: Face Your Unhealthy Jealousy-Related Theme in Imagery Step 9: Act in Ways That Are Consistent With Your General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitude Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Unhealthy Jealousy Other Important Issues in Dealing With Unhealthy Jealousy Dealing With Your Safety-Seeking Measures to Avoid Unhealthy Jealousy Why You Feel Unhealthy Jealousy Much of the Time and How to Deal With this How to Deal With Chronic Unhealthy Jealousy How to Examine the Accuracy of Your Unhealthy Jealousy-Related Inference, If Necessary Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Unhealthy Jealousy Developing and Rehearsing Healthy Jealousy-Based World Views Note Chapter 10 Dealing With Unhealthy Envy Understanding Unhealthy Envy Major Inference Theme in Unhealthy Envy Rigid/extreme Attitudes Behaviour Associated With Unhealthy Envy Thinking Associated With Unhealthy Envy How to Deal With Unhealthy Envy Step 1: Identify Reasons Why Unhealthy Envy Is a Problem for You and Why You Want to Change Step 2: Take Responsibility for Your Unhealthy Envy Step 3: Identify the Themes About Which You Tend to Feel Unhealthy Envy Step 4: Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Envy Response and Set Goals With Respect to Each Component Identify the Three Components of Your Unhealthy Envy Response Set Goals With Respect to Each of the Three Components Step 5: Recognise That Your Symptoms of Unhealthy Envy Are Evidence of Disturbance and Not Necessarily That You Truly Desire the Prized Object That the Other Person Has, But You Don’t Step 6: Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes and Alternative General Flexible/ Non-Extreme Attitudes Identify Your General Rigid/extreme Attitudes Identify Your Alternative General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Step 7: Examine Your General Attitudes Examine Your General Rigid Attitude and Its General Flexible Attitude Alternative Examine Your General Extreme Attitude and Its General Non-Extreme Attitude Alternative Step 8: Face Your Unhealthy Envy-Related Theme in Imagery Step 9: Act in Ways That Are Consistent With Your General Flexible/non-Extreme Attitude Step 10: Capitalise On What You Have Learned Step 11: Generalise Your Learning Using REBT’s ABCD Form to Deal With Specific Examples of Your Unhealthy Envy Other Important Issues in Dealing With Unhealthy Envy Rethinking the Place of Objects in Your Life Making Healthy Comparisons Why You Feel Unhealthy Envy Much of the Time and How to Deal With this How to Deal With Chronic Unhealthy Envy How to Examine the Strength of Your Desire for What Others Have That You Prize, But Don’t Have Assessing and Dealing With Emotional Problems About Unhealthy Envy Developing and Rehearsing Healthy Envy-Based World Views Notes References Appendix 1 Descriptions, Foundations and Illustrations of Thinking Errors and Their Realistic and Balanced Alternatives Appendix 2 Reasons Why Rigid Attitudes Are False, Illogical and Have Largely Unhealthy Consequences and Flexible Attitudes Are True, Logical and Have Largely Healthy Consequences Appendix 3 Reasons Why Awfulising Attitudes Are False, Illogical and Have Largely Unhealthy Consequences and Non-Awfulising Attitudes Are True, Logical and Have Largely Healthy Consequences Appendix 4 Reasons Why Unbearability Attitudes Are False, Illogical and Have Largely Unhealthy Consequences and Bearability Attitudes Are True, Logical and Have Largely Healthy Consequences Appendix 5 Reasons Why Devaluation Attitudes Are False, Illogical and Have Largely Unhealthy Consequences and Unconditional Acceptance Attitudes Are True, Logical and Have Largely Healthy Consequences Appendix 6 ABCD Blank Form With Instructions Notes for Practitioners 1. Write Down a Brief, Objective Description of the ‘Situation’ You Were in 2. Identify Your ‘C’ – Your Major Disturbed Emotion, Your Dysfunctional Behaviour And, If Relevant, Your Distorted Subsequent Thinking 3. Identify Your ‘A’ – this Is What You Were Most Disturbed About in the Situation 4. Set Emotional, Behavioural and Thinking Goals 5. Identify Your Rigid/extreme Basic Attitudes (I.e., Rigid Attitude + Awfulising Attitude, Unbearability Attitude Or Devaluation Attitude) 6. Identify the Alternative Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes That Will Enable You to Achieve Your Goals (I.e., Flexible Attitude + Non-Awfulising Attitude, Bearability Attitude Or Acceptance Attitude) 7. Develop Persuasive Arguments to Convince Yourself That Your Rigid/extreme Attitudes Are False, Illogical and Unhealthy and That Your Flexible/non-Extreme Attitudes Are True, Logical and Healthy – ‘D’. These Arguments Will Help You to Achieve Your Emoti 8. Re-Examine ‘A’ and Consider How Realistic It Was. Given All the Facts, Would There Have Been a More Realistic Way of Looking at ‘A’? If So, Write It Down Use Supervision Appendix 7 Quick Reference Guide to the Nine Emotional Problems and Their Healthy Alternatives Anxiety Versus Concern Depression Versus Sadness Guilt Versus Remorse Unhealthy Regret Versus Healthy Regret Shame Versus Disappointment Hurt Versus Sorrow Unhealthy Anger Versus Healthy Anger Unhealthy Jealousy Versus Healthy Jealousy Unhealthy Envy Versus Healthy Envy Index In this practical companion to the client manual, Windy Dryden draws on Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy (REBT) – an approach that focuses on identifying, examining and changing the rigid/extreme attitudes that largely determine emotional and behavioural issues – to encourage people to deal with their emotional problems.This practical guide presents each emotion in a similar way, allowing the reader to compare and contrast common and distinctive features of each problem.Including all of the information presented in the Client’s Guide with the addition of helpful hints and tips for the therapist, the Practitioner’s Guide is straightforward to use in the consulting room with no need for further references. It allows the therapist to work through and help the client learn to deal with their problems from an REBT perspective, covering: ‌⦿ anxiety‌⦿ depression‌⦿ guilt‌⦿ shame‌⦿ hurt‌⦿ unhealthy anger‌⦿ unhealthy jealousy‌⦿ unhealthy envy‌⦿ and a new chapter on unhealthy regret.With new REBT research and updated, accessible terminology, this new edition will remain essential reading for any professional using REBT with their client. rigid;,negative;,major;,alternative;,irrational;,belief;,main;,general;,beliefs;,healthy rigid,negative,major,alternative,irrational,belief,main,general,beliefs,healthy