Tequila Mockingbird

Normal0falsefalsefalseEN-USX-NONEX-NONEMicrosoftInternetExplorer4 Carter Ratcliff's Tequila Mockingbird is a sexy, urbane, hilarious tale crossed with a fast-paced, camp, social comedy, with a touch of thriller, told in the unforgettable voice of fashion model Fiona Mays. Irresistible, loving, smart, and funny, Fiona is prey to "racing thoughts" that have a way of turning her flaws into virtues and virtues into flaws. It is from these reversals her story flows, as Fiona discovers that her supermodel best friend Brenda Rawlings is receiving death threats from Sergei Propokoff, the Russian oligarch she's been dating. The beautiful princess Brenda must be saved from Sergei the ogre and—the crucial point—this rescue is up to Fiona and Fiona alone. As Fiona tries to focus on her mission, Tequila Mockingbird takes us on a tour of New York hot spots, from scenes set in the worlds of high fashion and high art to the nightlife of lower Manhattan and a Brighton Beach mob hangout, with continuous returns to the Upper East Side home of Brenda's "stunning presence," of which Fiona relates: "...the moment I see her I start to get in sync. Not that she tries to be overwhelming or anything. It's just that she's way better looking than just about anyone else who was ever born. And so sweet. Kind of weirdly flawless, meaning she has this aura that draws you in. Whatever is happening, it's all about her, and that feels OK." But this first novel by a distinguished art critic and contemporary poet is, first and last, Fiona's unique and engaging voice as she reminisces, explains, complains, cajoles, seduces, and, most of all, jokes around—and deep into her personality we follow. And as it tells us who she is, her words conjure up spectacular images of the glamorous and often treacherous world where she lives and precariously flourishes. Secretly the book ends up a love story between the reader and the amazing Fiona! Longer, thicker, stronger ... some girls obsess about it, but I’m way more realistic. I mean, the last guy who really got me off was totally average in the dick department. He was pretty average all around, but nice. So we had a nice time, plus highlights in bed. He found me in Spain, Málaga, to be exact, and took me to Ibiza for a week. Which was ultra-nice. One afternoon, I swear, every pair of male eyes on the island was ogling me in my basically invisible bikini. At night, I went to parties with this guy, the one with the average dick. The general idea was, here she is. My gorgeous model girlfriend. Proof of the pudding, though he did all the eating, except for this lovely afternoon in one of those thatched-hut things with this girl with no tan line who couldn’t get enough of me. Yummy.Of course, the general idea is never quite what you think it is. Sooner rather than later I figured out that this very nice guy was giving people the impression that he was about to dump me. Just to show that he wasn’t grateful to be with this hot number—namely, me—and to explain ahead of time why I would not be hanging on his arm like a total lamo the next time he showed up on Ibiza. He never let me in on this side of his plan, needless to say, but I’m pretty sure this was it because one of his supposed friends started sniffing around me the second time we met, at this party on a terrace that reached way out over the waves. Which were about a thousand feet below.Scary, right? Normal 0 false false false EN-US X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 Carter Ratcliff's Tequila Mockingbird is a sexy, urbane, hilarious tale crossed with a fast-paced, camp, social comedy, with a touch of thriller, told in the unforgettable voice of fashion model Fiona Mays. Irresistible, loving, smart, and funny, Fiona is prey to ""racing thoughts"" that have a way of turning her flaws into virtues and virtues into flaws. It is from these reversals her story flows, as Fiona discovers that her supermodel best friend Brenda Rawlings is receiving death threa