The Computer Contradictionary: 2nd Edition

[The Computer Contradictionary] is ultimately a manual to our industry, computer history, and much of your universe as it really ought to be. It is also the first dictionary you're likely to read in one sitting. Enjoy! -- Andrew Binstock, UNIX Review ''With his mind-numbing grasp of English, literature, computer history, and programmer culture, Stan is the Umberto Eco of programming.'' -- Ron Burk, Windows Developer's Journal ''Ascertain the meaning before consulting this dictionary,'' warns the author of this collection of deliberately satirical misdefinitions. New computer cultures and their jargons have burgeoned since this book's progenitor, The Devil's DP Dictionary, was published in 1981. This updated version of Stan Kelly-Bootle's romp through the data processing ''laxicon'' is a response to the ''Unix pandemic'' that has swept academia and government, to the endlessly hyped panaceas offered to the MIS, and to the PC explosion that has brought computer terminology to a ''hugely bewildered, lay audience.'' The original dictionary, an urbane and witty pastiche of Ambrose Bierce's famous work, parried chiefly the mainframe and mini-folklore of the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s. This long-awaited revision adds over 550 new entries and enhances many of the original definitions. Key targets are ''a host of new follies crying out for cynical lexicography [including] the GUI-Phooey iconoclasts, object orienteering, and the piping of BLObs down the Clinton-Gore InfoPike.'' ack n. [Origin: back-formed negation of nak.] A signal indicating that the error-detection circuits have failed. computer science n. [Origin: possibly Prof. P. B. Fellgett's rhetorical question, ''Is computer science?''] A study akin to numerology and astrology, but lacking the precision of the former and the success of the latter. multimedia n. An application attacking all five senses of the user -- sight, hearing, smell, taste, and touch -- but especially, smell. 0262611120-f30.jpg......Page 1 titles......Page 0 Introduction to TIHI Computer Contradictionary......Page 2 page3......Page 3 Introduction to the First Edition......Page 4 page7......Page 5 Guide......Page 6 A......Page 7 image1......Page 8 image1......Page 9 ADD......Page 10 table1......Page 11 page7......Page 12 slgorasm......Page 13 page9......Page 14 9......Page 15 ancillary adj. [From Latin ancilla "maid."] Preferred DP spelling: andl­......Page 16 page12......Page 17 page13......Page 18 13......Page 19 argument......Page 20 page16......Page 21 page17......Page 22 auto-antonym......Page 23 image7......Page 24 image5......Page 25 eutoeplstemlc......Page 26 -aware suffix Largely spurious as in data-aware. See also -READY.......Page 27 B......Page 28 page26......Page 29 image1......Page 30 page28......Page 31 page29......Page 32 bloat, code n. See CODE BLOAT.......Page 33 books, computer n. See COMPUTER BOOKS.......Page 34 Braln-asslsted See BA.......Page 35 page33......Page 36 bus n. A ponderous vehicle for transporting people or data at irregular inter­......Page 37 table1......Page 38 c+-......Page 39 page4......Page 40 page5......Page 41 card, blank n. See BLANK CARD.......Page 42 page7......Page 43 Chain or Cha'n, Daisy. See DAISY CHAIN.......Page 44 page9......Page 45 client/server......Page 46 page11......Page 47 page12......Page 48 page13......Page 49 computable......Page 50 page15......Page 51 page16......Page 52 page17......Page 53 page18......Page 54 cursor......Page 55 cursor address......Page 56 D......Page 57 DARPA See ARPA.......Page 58 page25......Page 59 DEe......Page 60 depilation......Page 61 dentference......Page 62 page29......Page 63 page30......Page 64 downsize v. intrans.& v. trans. See RIGIITSIZE.......Page 65 page32......Page 66 dump......Page 67 page34......Page 68 E......Page 69 64......Page 70 page4......Page 71 Thble of Environments·......Page 72 67......Page 73 page7......Page 74 page8......Page 75 expansion......Page 76 F......Page 77 72......Page 78 image3......Page 79 image2......Page 80 page16......Page 81 page17......Page 82 page18......Page 83 78......Page 84 page3......Page 85 image4......Page 86 image2......Page 87 gonad Ie adj. See DYADIC.......Page 88 Grand GUignol n. [French: Un spectacle d'une horreur sanglante et melo­......Page 89 Grosch'. Law, corollary to......Page 90 H......Page 91 image1......Page 92 image1......Page 93 hole, black, computing n. See SUPERCOMPUTER.......Page 94 page15......Page 95 hyphen......Page 96 I......Page 97 page20......Page 98 Identifier n. A string devised to obscure the program's semantics. "Today we......Page 99 page22......Page 100 "......Page 101 page24......Page 102 page25......Page 103 Impersonal computing......Page 104 page27......Page 105 page28......Page 106 101......Page 107 page30......Page 108 page31......Page 109 page32......Page 110 J......Page 111 John Birch machine......Page 112 107......Page 113 108......Page 114 109......Page 115 L......Page 116 page3......Page 117 page4......Page 118 113......Page 119 image1......Page 120 lexical scope n. One of natural language's many risible barriers to disam­......Page 121 LF......Page 122 page9......Page 123 loop, endless n. See ENDLESS LOOP.......Page 124 page11......Page 125 120......Page 126 M......Page 127 macaroon......Page 128 page17......Page 129 Malloc, malloc......Page 130 125......Page 131 126......Page 132 page21......Page 133 metaprogrammer n. Someone who is above programming but not yet ready......Page 134 129......Page 135 page24......Page 136 page25......Page 137 page26......Page 138 133......Page 139 134......Page 140 page29......Page 141 table1......Page 142 MTTR......Page 143 page32......Page 144 page33......Page 145 140......Page 146 Namespaces of the rich and famous See NEWfON.......Page 147 page3......Page 148 page4......Page 149 netwok......Page 150 NL......Page 151 146......Page 152 null......Page 153 page9......Page 154 page10......Page 155 o......Page 156 page14......Page 157 OCR area !!!!......Page 158 table1......Page 159 page17......Page 160 page18......Page 161 page19......Page 162 page20......Page 163 p......Page 164 page24......Page 165 page25......Page 166 pment......Page 167 162......Page 168 163......Page 169 page29......Page 170 personal computing......Page 171 Phalstos, disk of n. See x, CURSE OF.......Page 172 piracy......Page 173 plxe'......Page 174 169......Page 175 page35......Page 176 prayer......Page 177 precedence......Page 178 prlcefpertonnence......Page 179 page39......Page 180 page40......Page 181 page41......Page 182 page42......Page 183 page43......Page 184 Q......Page 185 ,......Page 186 real life See REALITY.......Page 187 reasoning, ce-.b8sed......Page 188 page8......Page 189 184......Page 190 retronym......Page 191 return......Page 192 s......Page 193 page15......Page 194 scalability n. Also called scalableness. See SCALABLE.......Page 195 190......Page 196 page18......Page 197 page19......Page 198 page20......Page 199 page21......Page 200 page22......Page 201 196......Page 202 page24......Page 203 page25......Page 204 page26......Page 205 page27......Page 206 standby......Page 207 KtP) = (k: \7'k, kj E Kd..P). k*(kj)(P) - (kj)(P)}......Page 208 image1......Page 209 page31......Page 210 supercomputer......Page 211 page33......Page 212 superstition......Page 213 auperuser......Page 214 page36......Page 215 T......Page 216 page3......Page 217 page4......Page 218 page5......Page 219 image1......Page 220 page7......Page 221 timesharing......Page 222 page9......Page 223 trademark......Page 224 traveling salesperson problem......Page 225 page12......Page 226 turnaround......Page 227 page14......Page 228 u......Page 229 undetected......Page 230 page19......Page 231 page20......Page 232 page21......Page 233 v......Page 234 page25......Page 235 virtual......Page 236 page27......Page 237 voton......Page 238 image1......Page 239 w......Page 240 page33......Page 241 page34......Page 242 x......Page 243 y......Page 244 z......Page 245 Acknowledgments......Page 246 page3......Page 247 page4......Page 248 page5......Page 249 "Ascertain the meaning before consulting this dictionary," warns the author of this collection of deliberately satirical misdefinitions.

New computer cultures and their jargons have burgeoned since this book's progenitor, The Devil's DP Dictionary, was published in 1981. This updated version of Stan Kelly-Bootle's romp through the data processing "laxicon" is a response to the "Unix pandemic" that has swept academia and government, to the endlessly hyped panaceas offered to the MIS, and to the PC explosion that has brought computer terminology to a "hugely bewildered, lay audience."

The original dictionary, an urbane and witty pastiche of Ambrose Bierce's famous work, parried chiefly the mainframe and mini-folklore of the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s. This long-awaited revision adds over 550 new entries and enhances many of the original definitions. Key targets are "a host of new follies crying out for cynical lexicography [including] the GUI-Phooey iconoclasts, object orienteering, and the piping of BLObs down the Clinton-Gore InfoPike."

ack n. [Origin: back-formed negation of nak.] A signal indicating that the error-detection circuits have failed.

computer science n. [Origin: possibly Prof. P. B. Fellgett's rhetorical question, "Is computer science?"] A study akin to numerology and astrology, but lacking the precision of the former and the success of the latter.

multimedia n. An application attacking all five senses of the user—sight, hearing, smell, taste, and touch—but especially, smell.

'Ascertain the meaning before consulting this dictionary,'warns the author of this collection of deliberately satirical misdefinitions. New computer cultures and their jargons have burgeoned since this book's progenitor,'The Devil's DP Dictionary', was published in 1981. This updated version of Stan Kelly-Bootle's romp through the data processing lexicon is a response to the'Unix pandemic'that has swept academia and government, to the endlessly hyped panaceas offered to the MIS, and to the PC explosion that has brought computer terminology to a'hugely bewildered, lay audience.'The original dictionary, a pastiche of Ambrose Bierce's famous work, parried chiefly the mainframe and mini-folklore of the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s. This revision adds over 550 new entries and enhances many of the original definitions. Key targets are'a host of new follies crying out for cynical lexicography including: the GUI-Phooey iconoclasts, object orienteering and the piping of BLObs down the Clinton-Gore InfoPike.' New computer cultures and their jargons have burgeoned since this book's progenitor, The Devil's DP Dictionary, was published in 1981. This updated version of Stan Kelly-Bootle's romp through the data processing "laxicon" is a response to the "Unix pandemic" that has swept academia and government, to the endlessly hyped panaceas offered to the MIS, and to the PC explosion that has brought computer terminology to a "hugely bewildered lay audience." The original dictionary, an urbane and witty pastiche of Ambrose Bierce's famous work, parried chiefly the mainframe and mini-folklore of the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s. This long awaited revision adds over 550 new entries and enhances many of the original definitions. Key targets are "a host of new follies crying out for cynical lexicography [including] the GUI-Phooey iconoclasts, object orienteering, and the piping of BLObs down the Clinton-Gore InfoPike." Stan Kelly-bootle. Originally Published: The Devil's Dp Dictionary. New York : Mcgraw-hill, 1981. Includes Bibliographical References.